Coloradoisms.

I lived in Colorado for several years as a child and go back every year to visit family. It’s a cathartically wondrous place with a one-of-a-kind attitudinal code. Put simply, you know you’re in Colorado when:

Covered bridges outnumber people.
Your snowboard costs more than your house.
Zamboni is a perfectly acceptable form of transportation.
Patagonia and North Face conquer Coach and Gucci.
Pint-sized skiers cop more spunk than NFL players.
Icicles rival prehistoric weapons.
Every radio station is country (but you somehow don’t mind).
You say “shred,” “butter the muffin,” or “carve phatties in the roy” at least once.
A river really does run through it.