Theatrical blood. Aimless staggering. Empty stares. Earlier today, more than 300 members of the undead infiltrated the Short North for the fourth annual Zombie Walk Columbus. This awesomely macabre event collects nonperishable food items for the Mid-Ohio Foodbank and was founded by Columbus resident Kurt Chaney.
Throughout the zombies’ two-mile traipse along High Street they had to “defend” themselves against the uniformed containment squad of S.T.A.R.S. Columbus*. But I must say, zombies are more polite than you could possibly expect. Several of them stopped to pose for my camera and one even complimented me on my dress. Plus they favor chilled Pellegrino and gourmet chocolate cones from Jeni’s. “Hey, this zombie stuff’s hard work and it’s hot out” one of them explained. Their cute little outstretched arms became quite endearing. Alas, in what has become the Zombie Walk Columbus grand finale, the troopers “shot down” the corpses upon their final trudge to Goodale Park. I guess when it brains, it gores.
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* Inspired by the video game Resident Evil
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